Summary:<\/b> Eiko meets Jamie again and again (and again.)<\/p>\n
Notes:<\/strong> Written for a class back in 2015, and also inspired by that one Tumblr post detailing this same premise. If you know, you know.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Eiko could hear her heart beating in her ears. The lecture had started two minutes ago, she was about four blocks away, she couldn’t be tardy again<\/em>, why did she think she could–<\/p>\n “Excuse me!”<\/p>\n She tried to push her way through the crowd but fell instead. Cursing under her breath, she scrambled up and tried to pick up her things–a sheet of paper had fallen from one of her notebooks, the exam outline for next week, and she rushed toward it.<\/p>\n A foot landed on it before the wind could blow it away. A hand stuck out to her.<\/p>\n Eiko looked up to see someone, with light hair and warm eyes smiling down on her. Their hair was shoulder-length and looked soft under the afternoon sun. They had a camera around their neck.<\/p>\n Eiko blinked and realized she was staring.<\/p>\n “Hello,” said the person. “Is this yours?” They picked up the piece of paper and handed it to her.<\/p>\n Eiko tried not to stutter.<\/p>\n “Y-Yes.”<\/p>\n “You looked like you were in a hurry,” they said. They were still smiling. “You better continue.”<\/p>\n They must’ve noticed that she was staring. Eiko felt her cheeks flame, and her heartbeat quickened. “R-Right,” she said. She needed to stop being so silly; this was a stranger, and it was unlikely that she’d see them again.<\/p>\n “Um,” she said, and started past.<\/p>\n The stranger called out, “We can exchange numbers later!” When Eiko turned around in surprise, the stranger winked and shot a picture before heading off.<\/p>\n It was so silly, but Eiko’s insides were light the rest of the way to her class. She slipped into the lecture hall with less tension than she would’ve otherwise. As she took her pencil from behind her ear, she thought about that stranger.<\/p>\n Her neighbor, Alex, said, “You’re smiling.”<\/p>\n “Am I?” Eiko touched her lips. They were upturned.<\/p>\n “You don’t usually smile when you come in late,” Alex whispered to her.<\/p>\n “You’re right,” Eiko agreed.<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n It was a beautiful spring this year. Eiko’s mother bemoaned how much more humid it was in Japan, and Eiko laughed and said that she should come to the States. We have blue poppies, Eiko would say. Eiko’s mother would reply, Don’t lie to me, and Eiko could hear the smile in her voice.<\/p>\n She wasn’t sure how common blue poppies were, only that as April rolled around, lots of people put their flowerpots out on their balconies for the rain to water. Her mother would love the sight, brick apartments, metal railings, the outdoor city garden.<\/p>\n Weekends were easy, a breather. Eiko usually didn’t like spending money on eating out, but she figured once in a while she could treat herself. She gazed at the flowerpots and the restaurant signs,<\/p>\n and nearly crashed into someone.<\/p>\n “Oh! Excuse me,” she said, but the person she’d crashed into was the same stranger from before. The one with the hair and camera.<\/p>\n They smiled and said, “You like greeting me that way, don’t you?”<\/p>\n “I- I don’t.” Eiko’s heart leapt. “I don’t do it on purpose<\/em>.”<\/p>\n “I know.” The stranger laughed, and leaned forward. Eiko thought they might’ve wanted to touch her shoulder, but instead they pressed a button on their camera and capped the lenses. “I’m Jamie.”<\/p>\n “Eiko.”<\/p>\n “That’s a cool name,” said Jamie. “Are you busy right now? Or do you want to go and eat somewhere?”<\/p>\n “I’d love to eat with you!” Eiko blushed, because she’d answered right away, and maybe a little too quickly.<\/p>\n But Jamie said, “Awesome,” and started walking. Eiko rushed to their side to follow. “There’s this place I go to all the time, they have really good Indian food.”<\/p>\n “Oh?” Eiko watched their profile. Then she realized she was staring again. “I haven’t been to many restaurants around here. Do you eat out a lot?”<\/p>\n “Hmm? Do you want to repeat that?”<\/p>\n Jamie was grinning at her. Eiko blinked, and shook her head hesitantly. Jamie laughed.<\/p>\n They threw their head back when they laughed, mouth open and delightful. “I’m just playing with you,” they said, as they stopped in front of a restaurant and started walking in.<\/p>\n A waiter led them to a booth near the back. They slipped in, and Eiko’s phone beeped. It was a text message from Alex, asking about their weekend homework.<\/p>\n As Eiko typed out a reply, a thought occurred to her. “Oh!” she said. “We should exchange phone numbers.” Then she blushed at how forward she sounded. “I mean, if you don’t mind.”<\/p>\n “Of course not.” Jamie was eyeing her phone. “I apologize in advance for my slow replies, though, because I’m not exactly up to speed with technology.”<\/p>\n When Eiko slid her phone across the table, Jamie sent a Nokia mobile. Eiko blinked in surprise, but laughed. “I see what you mean,” she said. “These guys last forever, don’t they?”<\/p>\n Jamie laughed as well. “They do.”<\/p>\n Jamie was the type of person to take pictures of their food when it came. Eiko chuckled and said, “You should invest in a smartphone,” and Jamie said, “I will when the time is right.”<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n Eiko’s phone buzzed in the middle of her physics homework. She had turned it to vibrate to stop herself from getting distracted (Alex already resorted to spamming her with emojis), but she can’t resist herself from looking at the screen anyway.<\/p>\n Jamie’s name flashed on her screen, for a phone call.<\/p>\n Eiko’s heart leapt. No, she had to do her homework. But… Jamie was calling. Jamie must want something important from her.<\/p>\n Her fingers itched.<\/p>\n If she didn’t answer soon, Jamie might not call again. And it would just look pathetic if Eiko called them back right after it went to voicemail. Thinking about Jamie always filled Eiko with something bright. She only had so few chances.<\/p>\n She picked up the phone.<\/p>\n “Hi Eiko,” Jamie chirped, before Eiko could even let out a hello.<\/p>\n “Hi,” Eiko replied. She fiddled her mechanical pencil against her wrist.<\/p>\n “What are you up to?”<\/p>\n “Not much, just homework.”<\/p>\n “Oh! Sorry for interrupting you, then,” Jamie said.<\/p>\n Eiko giggled. She noticed she did that a lot when Jamie was on her mind, and tried to tone it down a little. “It’s no big deal,” she said. “Thanks, actually.”<\/p>\n She got a chuckle back. “I was just thinking about our lunch the other day,” said Jamie. Eiko’s heart raced even faster. “And then I thought, we should get lunch sometime during the week. So I was wondering when you were free.”<\/p>\n Even though no one was around, Eiko beamed. She and Jamie had been texting throughout the week – little things like good luck on her exam, Jamie acing an essay and having it be a regular thing, Eiko complaining about her neighbors. Jamie’s replies were always short because of the phone situation, but Eiko was happy at getting any text anyway.<\/p>\n “Wednesdays work for me,” she said.<\/p>\n “Sweet,” said Jamie. “It’s a date then.”<\/p>\n Eiko’s heart beat so fast she dropped her pencil.<\/p>\n “Oh,” she said, before Jamie might say goodbye. “Like. Um. Like a date date?”<\/p>\n “If you want it to be.”<\/p>\n Jamie sounded like they definitely meant it to be. Eiko’s insides flipped. “Yes!” she said, maybe a bit too loudly, too quickly. But that didn’t matter. “I do want it to be.”<\/p>\n Jamie’s laugh was light. “See you on Wednesday, then.”<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n Wednesday’s date turned into them racing to see who could eat the most rolls at the sushi bar and Jamie tapping out early and Eiko laughing. Jamie grumbled, “I thought by now that I would be a pro at handling sushi,” and Eiko replied, still feeling fine with a spicy tuna roll between her chopsticks, “You can’t out-sushi me.”<\/p>\n The next day she got out of one of her afternoon classes early and called Jamie up, asking if they were free. Jamie said yes and they agreed to meet up at a music store, except when Jamie came, camera slung over their shoulder, Eiko was distracted by all the one-dollar DVDs.<\/p>\n “Those usually aren’t very good,” Jamie tried to tell her.<\/p>\n But, “I can probably find a good deal in here,” Eiko said, rifling through the DVDs.<\/p>\n Jamie sighed, but snapped a photo and then assisted. And when they were proven to be right, they said, “Well, we should look around here, anyway.”<\/p>\n They browsed the aisles. Eiko’s eyes lit up when she saw the discs of a few artists that she recognized, and pointed them out to Jamie.<\/p>\n “What kind of music do you listen to?” Jamie asked, while pulling out one of the CDs that Eiko knew.<\/p>\n Eiko shrugged. “Whatever’s on the radio, like in this store,” she said, gesturing upwards. “My phone has mostly soundtracks and stuff, especially from my mom’s dramas.” She smiled at the thought of her mom, making soymilk while yelling at their small TV in the old kitchen.<\/p>\n “That’s cool,” said Jamie. “The radio’s always playing interesting stuff. It’s always new.”<\/p>\n “Especially new for me,” Eiko said, and laughed to herself. When Jamie turned to her, she said, “As an international student.”<\/p>\n “Oh, right.” Jamie stepped forward, maybe to try to make her a little more comfortable. “It must be really<\/em> new for you then.”<\/p>\n “Yeah.” Eiko sighed. She tugged her dress at the hem. “Everything is.”<\/p>\n They were quiet as they continued staring at the CD covers. Then Jamie said, “You can talk to me about it, if you want.”<\/p>\n “It’s nothing.” Eiko tried to laugh, but something in her throat was stopping her. “You know, Dad moves back to the U.S., Mom buys me dresses, that sort of.” She tried to laugh again.<\/p>\n Jamie watched her.<\/p>\n “It’s nothing,” Eiko said again. “I’m making it sound worse than it was. Like, the split was fine, it was just, Mom told me it was probably best if I came to America for university. I called my dad and he helped me move here and I heard him ask my mom about the skirts in my suitcase.”<\/p>\n “And they’re fine, right?” Jamie’s tone was sharp.<\/p>\n “They are!” Eiko assured. The first time her dad had called her ‘daughter’ had made her heart swell. At the time, her mother already had for years.<\/p>\n “Good,” said Jamie, “or else I would’ve bust out the fisticuffs.”<\/p>\n Eiko giggled. The fluorescent lights flickered, and Jamie outshone them.<\/p>\n “You seem so comfortable with yourself,” said Jamie. “It took me ages to figure out who I was, but.” They grinned. “Figuring out you’re nothing takes some time, too.”<\/p>\n Eiko said, “That sounds depressing out of context.”<\/p>\n “That’s me in a nutshell,” said Jamie. “Depressing out of context.”<\/p>\n Eiko leaned into Jamie’s shoulder and giggled. She did so even more when Jamie held her hand and suggested that they go do something more exciting than stand around in front of a giant poster of Lady Gaga. Eiko asked if she could play with the camera while they walked, and Jamie said sure.<\/p>\n They went to the movies, apparently while Alex was working, who ticketed them. Eiko said a thank you and, “See you in class,” and Alex said, “Maybe before then.”<\/p>\n She and Jamie watched a romance movie and laughed at all the sappy parts. Jamie held her hand the whole time.<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n Sunlight streamed through her kitchen windows. Eiko hummed as she washed her hands, going back to rolling the dough for her dumplings. A few minutes later she realized she’d left the sink running, and went to go turn it off.<\/p>\n Her phone was ringing somewhere in the apartment. She dashed to her bedroom and found it on her pillow. “Hello?” she said, as she picked up.<\/p>\n “Hey.” The sound of Jamie’s voice made the sun seem even brighter. “Do you want to go out and get something to eat?”<\/p>\n “Oh.” Eiko stared at her half-full tray of uncooked dumplings. “I’m actually in the middle of making food right now. But I can do dinner!”<\/p>\n “No, it’s fine,” said Jamie. “Actually, can I come over now?”<\/p>\n There was something in Jamie’s voice that made Eiko feel on edge. Maybe it was just because they were on the phone. “Sure,” she said. “Is there something wrong?”<\/p>\n “No, nothing,” said Jamie. “As long as you don’t mind me coming over.”<\/p>\n “O-Of course not.” Eiko blushed at her stutter.<\/p>\n She gave Jamie her address, then returned to folding her dumplings. Her fingers were a little more jumpy as she pinched them together.<\/p>\n When her doorbell rang, she called, “Coming!” and washed her hands again. She went to the door and opened it; even though her insides were jittering, she still felt warm all over when she saw Jamie, and the camera.<\/p>\n “Hi.” Jamie smiled. “You’re making food pretty seriously, aren’t you?”<\/p>\n Eiko realized she was still wearing her apron, which was covered with white powder. “Yeah,” she said. “Come on in, I hope you don’t mind watching me cook.”<\/p>\n “Of course not.”<\/p>\n Jamie walked inside and started taking off their shoes. Eiko shut the door and led them into the kitchen.<\/p>\n As Eiko returned to her dumplings, Jamie gazed around and sat at the dining table. “How long have you had this apartment?”<\/p>\n “Since last year,” Eiko said. “My dad pays for it, but I’m going to try to get a job over the summer. Alex might be able to put in a good word for me at the cinema.”<\/p>\n “That’d be cool.”<\/p>\n Jamie watched as Eiko made more dumplings and placed them on the tray.<\/p>\n After a beat,<\/p>\n “Did you feel like meeting me was like destiny?”<\/p>\n Eiko practically dropped the dumpling she’d just finished. She put it on the tray carefully.<\/p>\n “Um,” she said, glancing back at Jamie.<\/p>\n It was getting warmer out, but not warm enough for the sound of the air conditioner to distract her. Eiko wished she worked well with music.<\/p>\n Jamie was waiting for more. Eiko decided to add, “I don’t really know what you mean?”<\/p>\n “Like,” said Jamie. “I don’t know, I guess I’m just wondering how it felt meeting me.”<\/p>\n Eiko hadn’t dated a whole lot of people–a not really girlfriend when she was in junior high, a serious girlfriend when she was in high school. She hadn’t looked the same, but all her girlfriends had known, even let her steal some of their clothes while she was dating them.<\/p>\n People didn’t ask questions like this, unless they wanted to hear a certain answer. Eiko didn’t know what that answer was, though, and said, “It felt like meeting you,” and couldn’t quite read Jamie’s laugh. She followed it up with, “What about you? How did it feel meeting me?”<\/p>\n Jamie’s response was almost immediate. Like it was practiced.<\/p>\n “I’d been looking for you and then I found you,” Jamie said. “That’s how it always feels.”<\/p>\n Eiko blinked.<\/p>\n “What?”<\/p>\n “I’ve been wanting to tell you since.” Jamie was standing up now, hands twisting together, smile wide on their face. Eiko had never seen it before. “Well, since I saw you, I guess. I always hold myself back, but then I see you and I want<\/em> to, you know?”<\/p>\n “You want to what?” Eiko asked.<\/p>\n Jamie bounced on their feet. They were looking at Eiko, but it didn’t feel like it. “That’s why I wanted to see you today,” Jamie said.<\/p>\n Eiko wanted to see Jamie too–well, all the time to be honest. Because they were dating. “What the hell are you talking about?”<\/p>\n “I know you,” said Jamie, reached out to grab Eiko’s hand. Jamie’s hand was always large and comforting, but the afternoon sun was so bright that Eiko couldn’t really feel anything. “Well, I do<\/em> know you, but more than that. I’ve known you for a while. For a really long time.”<\/p>\n “W-What?” Eiko thought about pulling back. Jamie was tracing the lines on her hands like they knew exactly were each line would lead. “I haven’t–You’re not someone I’ve forgotten, have I?”<\/p>\n Jamie laughed. “Kind of, but not really. It’s not your fault.”<\/p>\n Eiko needed to cook the dumplings. To finish making the dumplings.<\/p>\n “I don’t understand,” she said, and stepped away.<\/p>\n She stepped onto the vent that cool air would be pooling out of, if it were summer.<\/p>\n Jamie smiled and said, “You always look the same,” and cupped her face.<\/p>\n Eiko grabbed Jamie’s wrists and pulled them down. “Can you please,” she said, “please<\/em> just. Tell me what’s going on.” In the distance she could hear the police sirens that were always blaring on campus. They softened the silence around her ears.<\/p>\n Jamie glanced down. Still, Eiko couldn’t recognize their smile. “It’ll sound silly when I say it.”<\/p>\n “Just say it,” Eiko pleaded.<\/p>\n “You were another person before this,” said Jamie. “And another person before that. And I keep,” a smile, “I keep being able to find you. I’m not even from around here, but I managed to get here, and every other time I always get. Pushed to where you are.”<\/p>\n Eiko tried to process the words. Maybe she was missing something.<\/p>\n “I’m not exactly,” said Jamie. “Well, human isn’t the right word for it. I’m human, just. Can’t die like one. Or perhaps at all.”<\/p>\n Jamie was standing right beneath the sunroof. Eiko wanted to close her eyes.<\/p>\n “You can,” said Jamie. “You do, I mean. You’re normal in your own way.”<\/p>\n “I don’t–”<\/p>\n Eiko headed back toward her dumplings. She had dumplings to make, to cook. Maybe she’ll eat them for dinner, too. And she had homework. And an exam next week.<\/p>\n “Is this some kind of joke,” she said quietly, even though she didn’t believe her own words. What would Jamie gain from this?<\/p>\n “It’s not, I promise.”<\/p>\n Jamie went over to her, but Eiko wished they would go away. The hands on her waist didn’t feel real.<\/p>\n “Come over to mine tomorrow,” Jamie said. “I have something to show you. Is that okay?”<\/p>\n Eiko wanted to say no. But she couldn’t, when Jamie’s lips were against her neck like that.<\/p>\n “Okay,” she said.<\/p>\n “Promise?”<\/p>\n She nodded.<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n The next day was Sunday, even more beautiful than the day before. The sky was bright and the birds chirped as Eiko walked towards Jamie’s place. Jamie had given her the address yesterday before leaving.<\/p>\n Jamie answered the door right after Eiko knocked. “You’re here.”<\/p>\n “I am,” said Eiko. “Sorry if yesterday I made you feel–”<\/p>\n “No, no, it’s fine.”<\/p>\n Jamie eagerly stepped aside to let her in. Eiko entered.<\/p>\n She froze before she got a chance to take her shoes off.<\/p>\n Littered around Jamie’s living room were photo frames. Shelves and bookshelves and end tables and coffee tables. None of the frames were the same – several were tinted green, like they’d been used for decades. And they all had photos in them.<\/p>\n Eiko knew it wasn’t her in them, but. But it felt like looking into a lifetime of mirrors. The hair wasn’t always the same, nor the skin tone – in several it looked like she’d been raised as a daughter her entire life. But the face was always the same, the smile, the angle like the photographer knew how she wanted to be photographed.<\/p>\n “Isn’t it amazing?” Jamie sounded smug. “I can’t tell you how long it’s been – I stopped counting half a century ago.” When Eiko turned to them, she saw that they were grinning. “I always manage to find you, and you always fall in love with me.”<\/p>\n Eiko’s heart lurched, in a new way. “And you always fall in love with me?”<\/p>\n “Of course,” Jamie said, in beat. “Seeing you again is like always picking up where we left off.”<\/p>\n “I’m always the same?”<\/p>\n Questions flitted in and out of Eiko’s mind (wouldn’t that get boring? why can’t I live forever too? where are you from? what was I first like? do my parents, does anyone else know about this?<\/em>), too fast for her to track.<\/p>\n Jamie said, “You’re always exactly how I imagine.”<\/p>\n Eiko stared at the pictures around the apartment. All of her own faces stared back at her, like maybe they’d know she’d be here, long in the future.<\/p>\n Jamie went to get their camera, and turned it on. “See?” Jamie flipped through the photos that they’d taken from the past few weeks.<\/p>\n The faces did look like the ones in the frames. The silver one, black one, a cheap plastic lime green one. Eiko’s.<\/p>\n Eiko stared at the faces, the photos, her own two hands, and didn’t feel real.<\/p>\n *<\/p>\n Eiko liked the days of summer when it rained. She liked going to the beach on these days, called her mom and said that they were looking at the same ocean again. Her mom always cried. She’d been the one to give Eiko this habit in the first place.<\/p>\n The university campus was a half an hour drive from the beach, and Alex said that she was ridiculous when she said that she wanted to go. Her mom was asleep so Eiko would call her later in the evening. It might not even be raining in Mito.<\/p>\n She and Alex were walking to the parking lot where Alex’s car was parked when a flutter of bright hair caught her eye. Eiko tried to look away but the damage was done.<\/p>\n Alex asked, “Are you okay?”<\/p>\n Eiko said, “I’m fine.” She huddled under the umbrella they were sharing.<\/p>\n Jamie had not been happy when she’d broken them up. Jamie said things like, why?<\/em> and we were meant to be together!<\/em> and you’re going to come back to me.<\/em> Eyes warm, burning. Eiko had backed away and put her shoes back on and Jamie was begging for her to come back. Eiko had asked if the only reason Jamie was in love with her was because they kept finding her, if Jamie told themself they’d stay in love with her. If they thought Eiko wouldn’t fall in love with anyone else either.<\/p>\n Jamie had demanded, what the hell do you mean<\/em> and you’ve never fallen in love with anyone else<\/em> and I know you better than you know yourself!<\/em> Jamie had chased her, yelled for her to come back, and Eiko locked herself into her apartment and cried.<\/p>\n Spring passed. But the flowers bloomed into the next season.<\/p>\n She and Alex found the car, and Eiko said, “I call shotgun!” Alex laughed and said, “You say that like I’m not driving.” Eiko stuck her tongue out.<\/p>\n As Alex started the car, Eiko glanced out the window. But the lone figure was still there, gaze burning with hatred, burning with, you’ll come back to me. you always do.<\/em><\/p>\n Eiko’s heart sank.<\/p>\n “To the beach!” Alex declared, and her heart rose in her throat again.<\/p>\n “Yeah!” she whooped, and they both laughed. Alex turned on the radio and they sang along.<\/p>\n Eiko glanced into the window, past the outside, to her own reflection. She pocketed away the bright silhouette she might see in another life, and didn’t look back.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Summary: Eiko meets Jamie again and again (and again.) Notes: Written for a class back in 2015, and also inspired by that one Tumblr post detailing this same premise. 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