WEN QING: You don’t seduce people, you find the business majors and try to get them to join a multi level marketing scheme. And then you eat them.

“You’re so ridiculous. Who knew that my wife would want to ravish me all the time?” Still, Wei Ying presses closer with the front of her body. Lan Zhan can feel where she’s wet. “My wife, my dragon.”

Let me ask you again: there is a cultivator raised in a renowned sect, first of all the disciples and with a golden core stronger than nearly any other, but before he disappeared, he started practicing demonic cultivation. He was suddenly discovered by his sect and, to punish him for his deeds, was disowned with shame and as quietly as possible. Without a golden core or a sect to return to, he continued his crooked way of cultivating. What should be done? [Modern Cultivation AU]

Lan Zhan picks up the joint from the ashtray at his bedside and lights it in his mouth. Wei Ying turns at the sound of the click of the lighter and brightens. “Gimme,” he says, as Lan Zhan takes his pull.

Lan Zhan hands it over, mesmerized as Wei Ying drags through the cherry, eyes heavy and hazing over as he exhales. “There,” he says, and then sticks the joint back into Lan Zhan’s mouth. “All yours.”

The smoke from the blunt doesn’t compare to the fire Lan Zhan breathes into Wei Ying’s mouth.

(Dragon/human LWJ and fox/human WWX are married and get high together.)

He was looking for a specific reaction—to get Lan Zhan to lash out. All hard edges and demanding, the same way during the first scrim, Lan Zhan’s dark voice had made him loose and obedient, itching to both rebel and obey at the same time.

It’s them, whatever it is, but it doesn’t belong on the basketball court.

Wei Ying didn’t expect to enter a weird… something-with-benefits-and-power-play with the captain of the Gusu basketball team. He’s not sure if it’s worth it.

No one listens to the radio in this day and age, but somehow from a bunch of left clicking and right clicking, through Facebook and Twitter and Youtube, Wei Ying finds himself on the WQHS homepage—the UPenn student radio station, promising eclectic tastes from a variety of hosts. Wei Ying can’t remember giving a shit about his old college’s student radio before he dropped out, but it’s eleven at night and he has nothing else better to do. He clicks on the button that says Listen Here! and waits to be impressed.

Lan Zhan and Wei Ying join the mile high club.

“Can’t you be a good husband and let me off easy? Let me out early today? Look how nice it is!”

Following an agreement to allow Wei Wuxian to take his virginity, Lan Wangji returns to Yiling and discovers that Wei Wuxian is dead. Not one to rescind such promises, Lan Wangji finds another way to keep his end of it.

–

Or, a Dionysus & Prosymnus AU.